Whether you’re the top or the bottom, knowing how to have safer sex can help you avoid getting an STI. And since gay men are most likely to get HIV from anal sex, this information is especially important for them.
Using barrier methods like condoms is essential for safer sex, even when there’s no chance of pregnancy. Always use condoms and request that your sexual partners do the same.
1. Don’t forget the condom
Gay men who use condoms during sex are far less likely to become infected with HIV. HIV infects the body and weakens it, leaving you susceptible to infections that your immune system normally fights off. It is also possible to get HIV by having anal sex without a condom because the sensitivity of the anus means that cuts and abrasions during sex can allow HIV from the top’s cum or pre-cum to enter the bottom’s bloodstream.
Anal sex can also put you at risk of other sexually transmitted diseases (STIs) like chlamydia, herpes, and syphilis. This is because the prostate gland – which many gay men call the ‘male G-spot’ – can be touched during anal sex, and some drugs such as steroids can enlarge the size of the penis, increasing the sensation of penetration.
If you do have a bottom preference, always use a condom and be sure your partner is doing the same. You should also douse before doing bottom sex, as this can help to lubricate the lining of the anus and reduce the risk of infection. This is especially important if you do bottom play with dicks, as these can often be dirty. Also, don’t forget to change your position during sex so that both partners are protected. And, remember to get tested regularly. It’s a great idea to mark the date of your last test on your calendar or use one of the gay hookup apps that can remind you when it is time for a test.
2. Don’t forget the douching
There are many reasons why gay men choose to touch, but the main one is that it makes for a cleaner, safer experience during anal sex. Anal sex can leave traces of poop, and no one wants to have that come out during a sex session. That’s why it’s important to douche before having anal sex, especially if you are going to be bottoming or using a large dick or sex toy.
Douching is not without its risks, however. It can irritate the delicate lining of the anus, and if done too often it can lead to infection. It can also increase the chances of sexually transmitted infections, particularly HIV. If you are douching, make sure to use clean water at body temperature and not douche too often.
It’s also a good idea to rinse your hands before and after handling any sex toys or dicks, and to use clean sheets and pillowcases. Always wipe down the dick with an anti-bacterial soap before and after sex and keep all sex tools, condoms, and lube clean. It’s also important to talk with any partners about sex position preferences and to ensure that everyone is up-to-date on their testing for STIs and HIV. If you are on PrEP, it’s still a good idea to get regular STI and HIV testing and get vaccinated against Hepatitis A and Hepatitis B.
3. Don’t forget the lubrication
Many gay men enjoy using lube during sexual intercourse as it can increase pleasure and reduce friction. However, not everyone enjoys it or may have a sensitivity to certain kinds of lubricants. If you do decide to use lubrication, choose a water-based lube that is safe with condoms. Avoid lubricants that contain oil as these can cause latex damage. Avoid lubricants with numbing or desensitizing agents as these can prevent you from knowing if something is wrong during sex and/or if you are experiencing pain.
For gay men who bottom, it is important to use a good quality lubricant and to douche before and after bottoming. This is because bottoming can irritate the lining of the anus and make it more susceptible to infection from HIV, herpes, chlamydia, gonorrhea, and other STDs and STIs. It is also recommended that those on PrEP should continue to use condoms and request regular STI/STD tests. For added protection, you should always practice sexual hygiene by washing your sheets, pillowcases, and sex toys after every use. If you are not on PrEP, you should still get a regular STI/STD test at least once every six months. For more information, visit our LGBT Health and Safer Sex categories.
4. Don’t forget the testing
Since HIV became associated with the gay community in the early 80s, sex protection has become one of the most important aspects of homosexual sex. But it’s not just about avoiding pregnancy; barrier methods are also a great way to protect against sexually transmitted infections like herpes, gonorrhea, chlamydia, and syphilis.
And because of the different ways men can be fucked, it’s essential that every gay man remembers to get tested regularly for STDs. Testing can be as simple as a swab of the anus (for guys who bottom) or a sample from the throat and rectal area (for those who prefer to top).
The good news is that there’s now access to pre-exposure prophylactic treatment, PrEP, that can help reduce STI risks for gay men. But it’s still essential that people remember to use condoms during sex and ask partners about their STI history.
While PrEP can be a powerful tool for protecting against HIV, it doesn’t protect against other STIs. That’s why it is still important that gay men get tested frequently, ideally every three months. You can keep track of when it’s time to test by setting a reminder on your phone or marking it on your calendar. And it’s important for tops and bottoms alike to get a full set of tests, including the male G-spot.